A Hole in My Heart

From the start i realize that I'm a Drama Queen. I can't stop once i started watch Korean or Japan series. Then i realize that maybe watch all of those dramas make my writing style sometime too sensitive and i'm a bit poetic. Sometimes i even remember the line of their dialogue and the scene in the drama. How freak i am!
But i will take some positive note in my freak hobby, i can write notes. Even though sometimes i didn't know why i wrote like that! Hahahaaha...
I didn't realize that i have lots of notes and sometimes I'm a bit embarrassed when i read over it again. How could i become so melancholic and sometimes  i told to myself. Wow, when i wrote all these stuffs!
This is one of them, i should make it become a song maybe (Laughing)...

A Hole in My Heart

I should’ve known from the start,

Maybe I already knew but I was pretending

My empty chest

I can fake my smile

I can fake my laugh

I can play a role like I’m a drama queen

I can do it, yes i can do it...

But deep inside my heart it just an empty room

An empty chest

It just become a hole in my heart

I’ve tried my best

But it just happened again…

It becomes a hole in my heart

I can’t hate others

I can’t blame others

I always want to do my best

I should’ve known and seen from the start, from the very beginning…

Nothing will change…

But I realize that I was hoping and I believed that I can do it

I can do it indeed, but nothing changed

What I’ve been through…

No need to know…

As I’ve known from the start

Just do my best that’s all I can do

Not for anyone but for me

For my own sake and people around who trust me

I can do it…

And this hole in my heart

All the disappointment

All the failure

All the things that makes a hole in your heart

Just accept it because it’s not a bad thing

It makes you stronger and tough

Just believe it…

愛は光の世、Can you live without love?

愛というと、なんという意味?

少しずつ分かっただと思う。

人生は愛のことは必要なことですよね。

大事なことでしょう。

愛はいらないと言ったら、自身がある?本当にいいの?

でもさ、人生はやっぱり愛は必要だと思う。

なんか、愛はない時はさみしいなあ感じ。

誰のため生きて行く、自分のためしか?できないだろう。

寂しそう。

意味ない、生きられない。

愛は光の世、
力強さ、

Can you live without love?

独り言 My Monologue!

Again,,This Japanese note was inspired by Itazurana Kiss Love in Tokyo, this time inspired by Itakiss Season 2. I was waiting this series since i watch season 1 in 2013. I was so happy when i noticed that they will make the special episode and also season 2. Then i watched it over and over again. I always waiting for the series every week. Then when the ending come closer absolutely i felt so sad and i couldn't say goodbye. It's hard to say goodbye and i couldn't bear it. That's the trigger why i wrote this note.
I'm a movie freak but i always want to take the positive value from everything i watched or read.
If there's no good point of the things that i did it will be useless and i want to share to everyone to take a good point on everything you did.

このドラマは本当にお終いなの?
なんかさようならの言葉は嫌な事だと思う。
私も大好きな事だったら、さようならの言葉は無理だよ。
だって、それは私の大事なことでしょう。
もういい。
やめた方が良いのかなぁ。
でも、信じられない。やめたくない。
私だったら、好きなことは諦めたくない。
ドラマのような、いつか私も自分の夢を叶えますように。
今度はちゃんと叶えますように。

そのドラマの教えてくれた事から、
今の私は夢中じゃなくて、本当の生活の中にいる。
だから、これからももっと頑張ります｡
し、あ、わ、せ!

Time to Wake up from My Dramaland

My dramaland, the place where i'm running away from all the things i didn't wish...
My dramaland is the place where my fantasies and my imagination took their roles.
My dramaland, where everything happen as i want
But it will become never ending stories
Coz it just happen as i imagine and as i wish...

My dramaland will always be my hidden place...

It's time for me to wake up from my dramaland
It's time for me to face all the reality,

If i know when to start something, then i have to know when the time to stop it...

My dramaland will be always there as my place to running away for a while
I will be there again somehow but for now it's time for me to wake up,leaving it as it is and continue what i have to finish...